8:16: T-Pain arrives in an elephant. Elephant? Clad in a T-Pain pendant. This is already ignorant. I love it.
8:19: Sway is in a helicopter. NIGGAS DONT DO HELICOPTERS!
8:24: Sway is still in a helicopter, can someone save this man? He looks malnourished in there.
8:25: "you're looking good up there" yes.
8:26: Oh my lord. Katy Perry has cameltoe. Miley Cyrus cant be ravaged yet, so i cant speak on that.
8:27: "I found this at a vintage store" ok Katy. why do all white people buy shit at a vintage store?
8:35: Kaba Modern performs to Ne-Yo's "Closer". They didnt do the leg thing, so the LOSE.
8:37: More Sway in a helicopter. This time...talking to the Jonas Brothers. How the mighty have fallen. "My daughter loves you guys:. Stop lying nigga
8:43: Christina Aguilera still lookin badder by the day. i wonder if the baby ripped her pom pom whole
8:44: Paris Hilton is still banging Benji Madden?
8:46: Slipknot. Damn near 40 years old and still wearing kids masks.
8:54: Ciara AKA "corey" is here. i can see her balls through her coochie/penis cutter dress
8:58: Jeezy pulls up in a Obama clad car. cool.
Who the fuck is Tokio Hotel?
Anyway, HERE WE GO!
9:00: Britney Spears and Jonah Hill this should be hilarious
9:02: It isnt.
9:03: WOW she is reading that teleprompter fast as shit
9:04: Rihanna and her forehead have arrived!
9:08: solid performance, i like how they were able to heft her ubelievable head.
9:09: Russell Bland is here.
9:10: and the crowd goes mild.
:10: Obama Joke.
9:11: Bush Joke.
:11: good palin joke.
:11: this guy's insane.
9:12: "use protection or BECOME REPUBLICAN"
9:12: The Jonas Bros. are crying right now.
9:15: Jamie Foxx!
:15: "Wake Up!" LMAO
:17: "Dont Shoot Me"- To T.I. LMAO
9:18: Britney Spears finally wins her first VMA. It woulda been great if they hadnt hyped it up for like a week before it happened.
9:27: Demi Moore.....i'd still give her the bizzzz.
:27: nice save by the gay dude for giving Demi the mic....that came out wrong.
9:29: does lil' wayne have a monroe piercing?
9:30: Jonas Bros. are performing on a soundstage, change channel
9:34: Do me a favor. Turn to VH1. Laugh. MTV are some mean bastards.
9:36: MTV is doing the VMA trivia shit during commercial. its like loading a game of NBA Live on Playstation One.
9:40: Teenage girls WILL do anything for cherry chapstick
9:41: Michael Phelps shows love to hip hop.
:41: Wayne is doing "Misunderstood", with Leona Lewis, new verse as well!
:43: "A Milli"!
:44: GOT MONEY! And Kobe approves!
:46: Standing Ovation #1. I dont know if it was hotter than T-Pains leather jacket.
9:58: What the fuck is "Twilight?
9:59: Paramore! Yellow Pants! Song really isnt that bad.
10:03: this show is about a 6/10 so far. if you are watching VH1 you arent missing anything
10:10: Shia Lebeouf could steal my girlfriend.
10:12: Pink is still alive?
10:23: MCLOVIN!!!!!
:25: Lil' Wayne wins Best Hip Hop award. 3 thank yous. god.family."yall".
:26: T.I! THATS NOT YOUR WIFE!
:27: T.I. has by far the best set of all the performances tonight
:29: T.I. performs "Live Your Life" with Rihanna. The new single apparently.
10:37: Corbin Bleu look like he could whip my ass now
:38: Christina Aguilera lookin like Catwoman. I liiiiikkkeeee
:41: the power rangers make an appearance!
:44: who is this anime character on my TV screen? WHO THE FUCK FUCK FUCK is tokio hotel?
:50: LL Cool J picks out lingere with Russell Brand.
:51: Paris fucks up less than 1 minute into being introduced, christ.
11:00: Kid Rock is up. the crowd goes mild. when did he switch to progressive country?
11:03: Lil Wayne and Kid Rock. And the crowd is still in their seats. Priceless. Not even Wayne can make Kid Rock cool again.
11:10: Kobe comes out to "Out Here Grindin". NOT the best choice of songs
:11: The TING TINGS BETTER WIN!
:11: They dont. Fuck Britney.
:12: Kanye time.
:14: And the "Love Lockdown" rumor is true.
:14: sounds like a house song. Kanye + Autotune
:17: I dont know if alot of people will uh.....like this new Kanye joint. I'm on the fence.
AND WE'RE DONE!
